Here’s a confession. I show love to one of my two daughters way more easily and way more frequently than the other.
Now, before you gasp and get dismayed, I reassure you that I did not say that I actually love one of my children more than the other. I simply have a much easier time displaying the love I hold for my eldest. The reason? Cause she’s waaay more like me. #penelopeintraining
My 14 year old’s love language is definitely Acts of Service. Make her a special meal, make her bed when she doesn’t have time or hide a little piece of chocolate in her lunchbox and you can almost visibly see her heart swell. She highly values thoughtfulness and intention. I get that. I can DO that.
However, my 11 year old? Her love language is very predominantly … quality time. Gulp. T.I.M.E. Small freakout. Minor panic.
Remember what I wrote recently about living my life with not so much margin?
At this stage of my life, time is a commodity. I just don’t have a lot of it … for myself or to give freely to others. I hate that its that way, but I’ve accepted that its my age/stage and that eventually I’ll get time back on my side.
However, this little precious girl can’t wait until my schedule frees up to feel loved by her momma. And, honestly, this is a puzzle I’ve been trying to solve for a while and I keep feeling like I come up short. So, color me thrilled when I recently had a lightbulb moment.
You Penelope gals encouraged me to schedule my downtime and it really worked for me! I reignited my passion for baking. And the other day when I was fueling my own soul, I realized that I could potentially enjoy one of my passions AND actively show love to my sweet girl at the same time! She has shown some interest lately in helping me in the kitchen and we’ve enjoyed some spontaneous moments side by side wielding whisks and aprons.
I decided to throw out an idea to her. I said, “Abby, what if on Tuesday afternoons you and I have a standing baking date? I’ll show you some of my favorite tricks and tips in the kitchen and we’ll get to experiment with some new recipes.”
Not surprisingly, but so enjoyably, she was 100% in! You should have seen her sweet smile.
This week we had our first ‘baking date’ and it was a blast! We both loved it. We were so excited to try out our yummy creation that we split one coffeecake muffin before they were all the way cooled AND before dinner. Woah. Wild.
I really feel like this whole topic of downtime has come full circle for me.
- I realized I needed to make a change.
- I asked for advice and
- Put that advice to action.
I found it was hugely beneficial to me personally to make the change. AND, I’ve now experienced the ripple effect that that change made on someone I love.
Here’s a question for you Penelopes: What are you waiting to change?
It’s most likely not scheduling downtime. Step back. Look at the big picture.
What in your life feels out of whack?
What struggle are you consistently ruminating on?
Get it out there. Name it. Ask people for insight and direction. Try to implement some new techniques.
I truly believe that when we push ourselves to grow, we find that the greatest benefit is being able to plant new seeds in those we love.
Oh and you didn’t think I was going to leave you hanging on the baked good, did you?
Today’s Treat: Gluten and Dairy Free Coffee Cake Muffins from Brittany Angell’s cookbook Every Last Crumb. Sooooooo delish. They’re made with almond flour, so maybe they’re a tiny bit healthier than what you’d find at your corner bakery?
Abigail hopes you enjoy them as much as we did!