Before I started Penelope Loves Lists, I set down two rules for myself:
1) I would write in my own authentic voice and not in some voice or style I think people might like better.
2) I would consistently post just two times per week on set days.
The first rule was so that I would learn to trust my own instincts, which is hard for me, and the second rule was that, given that I have 3 children, a husband and a pretty intense day job, I knew that posting more than that wouldn’t work for me.
The Big “But”: Buuuuuuuuut, once I started, and traffic and readership started rolling along at an amazing clip, I started getting lots and lots of requests from people to post more. And, just in the last week, I’ve seen two people link to this site saying it’s their favorite new blog (Great!) but then follow that up immediately with a complaint that I don’t post enough. (Ouch!)
My inner 13 year old started to whisper in my ear that maybe my two times per week schedule wasn’t enough. (That inner 13 year old is the same nasty chick who also whispers that I’m not as attractive as I should be and I’m chubby and yes, maybe I’m a fraud overall. She’s a real piece of work, that one.)
I caved into her and put a poll on the site asking if you guys want me to post more. And a whopping 75% of respondents said yes!
These people have a point. So much blog advice from the Big Bloggers says that, if you’re really serious, you must post at least 4-5 times a week. And I want to do a good job on Penelope Loves Lists. I love it immensely and, further, I want to always work hard and do my best at anything I do.
The Real Reason: And, here’s the kicker: I desperately want everyone to like me. All the time. And if I post more, maybe you will like me more. And that’s a Siren’s Call for me. I’ve done countless dumb things in my life in an effort to get people to like me. I know that it never works. Not 100%. And yet, it’s hard me for to just tell myself no.
The reality is, there’s simply no way I can post 4-5 times per week. I’d go crazy, put out crappy content, burn out and quit completely. And I don’t want to do that.
So, here’s where I need to put my Big Girl Panties on and honor my promises to myself, even if it terrifies me to do it. And it does.
The Decision: Here’s what I’ve decided: I’m going to continue to post consistently twice a week, on Sundays and Wednesdays. These are posts that are prepared carefully and in advance, according to an editorial calendar. And, if I have a particular itch to do a quick additional post on the fly at some other point in the week, most likely Fridays, great.
But I’m only going to promise myself twice a week. I’ll try to honor that promise I made to myself in an effort to learn to value myself and to hold my priorities dear, even in the face of my lifelong, sucking insecurity.
Let’s see if I can do this.
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{ 40 comments… read them below or add one }
I love to watch people live out their priorities. Count me in the group of people who now like you more.
good for you for sticking to your guns! i’ve tried to post more often than three times a week, and i find my content gets stale super fast – and i’m just starting my blog! i think finding what works for you is what’s most important, and anytime someone says they think you should post more, take that to mean they LOVE LOVE LOVE your writing!
i’ll be here every Sunday and Wednesday with bells on!
Good for you for sticking to your guns. If you’re only posting to please people and stick to a schedule, it’s not going to work for anyone. You might want to consider scheduling your posts to go up during the week b/c those are more high-traffic days (M-TH). Just an idea.
Of course we want you to post more often. If I had it my way, all of my favourite blogs would have a new and fantastic post every single day . I also want to eat chocolate and not get fat, go running and not get tired and have the energy to do my day job as well as all of things I love doing in my spare time every single day. Sadly I don’t think anyone has invented a time machine yet.
Keep up the brilliant posts, if that means we get one a week then that’s fine. This blog is only brilliant because you love doing it so don’t turn it into a chore for yourself. How about giving us more blogs or websites that you love? That way we can entertain ourselves for a few days and give you time to enjoy your life.
Hallelujah, sister! I’m trying to do the same and LOVE this post. Thanks from someone with a very similar 13-year-old self, bless her.
I am so happy to hear this. I would much rather count on a regular flow, than to have you burn out and quit entirely, as so many podcasters do.
Good for you. People that say nice things tempered with complaints will never be happy no matter what you do. That’s on them, not you.
dianne
Someone once said that the key to failure is trying to please everyone!!
If you aren’t doing it out of love you’ll end up resenting the whole thing. No one would enjoy it if that was the case, so be true to yourself and your decision.
Your family will appreciate you for putting them first & personally I think that is the ultimate message you are sharing with us here.
P.S.
We all have a noisy 13 year old whispering such vile untruths in our ears….I tell mine to back off and remind her that in order to have joy and balance in my life there is no room for her negativity!!
I will be looking forward to Sundays and Wednesdays!
This is your baby – post as often or as little as you want. Trust me, those of us who adore you and your blog will continue to looking forward to those wonderful posts. As another commenter said – good for you for sticking to your guns!!
Have a great weekend!
I am glad that you’re sticking to what you know you can handle. Honestly, I have been struggling with burn out for months. I got in the habit of posting so frequently, and now I feel like a big jerk for never posting. I’ve let life happen instead of strapping myself to my computer, and I’m starting to let myself be okay with that.
Good for you! There may be another time in your life when you’ll feel like you can write more, but this is obviously not the season for that. That’s totally respectable. I’d rather read 2x a week and enjoy something of quality, than have someone write for the sake of posting something which is just blah, blah, blah. I support your decision and will enjoy reading whenever you can post.
Think of it this way…by only posting twice a week you are actually helping your readership be more productive in our day jobs. And we need all the help we can get! I do love hearing from you though.
On a side note, I noticed your toothbrush inspiration (far right) to remove the silk from corn-on-the-cob. Brilliant. Yesterday, I watched as my 4 year old Penelope painstakingly removed the silks from 7 ears, all by herself and without a single hair left. Maybe next time, I’ll sport her the toothbrush. However, she does have a bit of frivolity in her as this morning I found her dad and my toothbrushes facing eachother, bristles intertwined. I asked her if she knew anything about that and she said, “Yeah. They’re kissing.” LOVE her!
Thank you so much for this post. I feel the pressure( although I think it is self impossed) to blog 4-5 times a week. I would actually rather not post more than two, three times max a week. I want to not let blogging slip higher on my priority list than it should be. Blogging should be fun not stressful.
P.s. Love my sedu straightner! Thanks again for the suggestion.
Good for you for holding true to your promise {to yourself.}
I fall into the same pressure of wanting to post often. Sometimes that’s easier said than done, and I always feel guilty when I don’t. As if everyone in the world is waiting on bended knee to read what I have to say! LOL
Last night, after a busy day of errands and commitments, my son’s Kindergarten put on a Bug Musical. After all was said and done, there was no time to post–and yet I still felt guilty. I’m trying to get over my Big Bad Self. ; )
I’d much prefer to read two great, high quality, well planned posts each week than 7 “posting ’cause I have to” posts… so no complaints here! Stay true to your priorities.xx
Yay, girl, do it YOUR way. It’s what counts. I respect you for that. Please yourself, it’s your blog.
i’m new …
i’ve only known you (your blog, really) for a week or two ….
i like you …
no need to change ….
That a girl (with big girl panties)! I’ll love what you bring to the table no matter how often it’s served up.
Now you are appointment-blogging! Like top-rated tv shows (aka appointment-television), I now know exactly when to catch you. Be good to yourself, and others will be good to you too!
It’s nice to see people who are confident enough to be true to themselves – people are drawn to confidence and I’m sure your blog will be as terrific as ever!
I hate that 13 year old! She’s so sneaky, and always wrong. Good on you for sticking to your promises to yourself!
Good for you! I admire your decision – and I appreciate the way you’ve laid out the process. For a long time I didn’t know that other people had inner critics (I call mine The Voice, and it’s way older than 13. I think it may be older than Lucifer.), so it’s always so helpful when people like you have the guts to write honestly about what they observe with themselves. Thanks
And tell you what else I’ve noticed: one thing that really silences The Voice is keeping my promises to myself. So again, good for you!
PS I too am new. Liked you right away! You’re perfect just the way you are, which is always true, all the time, unconditionally, for all of us.
So proud of you!! I would much rather read 2 quality posts a week and know that you are not sacrificing you family and sanity. Congratulations on choosing to be less “busy”!!!
I have only just come across your blog and love it! I had the same thing happen with my card making, I kept wanting to be like others and tried lots of different styles, but I read something on Etsy once about being true to yourself, create what you want to create, not what you think people want and I enjoy it a whole lot more! Blogging so much that you end up at the point of quitting isn’t fun. I like you already, more so that you are being true to yourself and keeping your promises!!
I am also new to your blog – discovered it recently through the “happiness project”. Even though I am admittedly one of the 75% of respondents who said yes to posting more frequently – I love your blog just the way it is as well!! Always look forward to great content and was so pleased to learn how many Penelopes are out there!
I respect your decision.
Good for you girl! Stick to your promises to yourself. For me I am often inspired for interiors posts. Can’t seem to get enough.
Yeah for you♥ I love your posts and two times a week makes them a real treat.
I’m only 50 but I have to give that inner 13 year old an occasional stare down too. And one thing I know for sure is Family First (you’ll never regret it..)
actually, i LOVE that you don’t blog everyday! gives me time to think about what you write, time to comment, read other comments, think about them…ect. i was wondering what was so different about your blog and now i realize that’s it…i have time to process it. i actually subscribe to follow-up comments so i can keep up with the comment “conversation”. i really appreciate that aspect. the other option is rushing to read or catch up reading post after daily post. that’s pressure i feel as a blog reader. thanks for explaining how you “work” things out (in your head, heart and life). very nice.
I’ll admit I did not read the previous comments so I suspect what I am saying has probably already been said before but I am glad to see that you are making a conscious decision to do what works for you and your life. I would much rather see two posts a week and you posting forever than you deciding to post four or five times a week and being burnt out in four months. So a big high-five for you and standing strong, no matter what the ‘big bloggers’ may say!
Hi Penelope,
I can relate to all that you are saying.
I wonder whether some of those that want you to post more have said so because of the disappointment of clicking over to your blog only to find no new post. I used to be like this before I discovered Google Reader. Maybe you could do a post on the benefits of a feed reader – it is a list after all. Even if they’re not getting the joy of reading more from you, they are being helped to be more patient. It worked for me.
All the best, Kristine – a fellow list-lover.
Wow. I’m honestly totally blown away by the immense support here.
Thanks to EVERY one of you for giving me confidence to stick to my promises to myself. I seriously treasure every comment on every post, but this one is special.
What a treat to have found all you guys!
Its wonderful to see you setting your priorities straight. I receive that siren’s call sometimes too and go crazy wanting to post more often that is possible for me in the long run b ut your schedule looks actually perfect for me too.
I have that same worry that maybe I should be posting more often. But I think that the whole reason to blog is for fun, and it shouldn’t have to be a chore.
I think you have the right attitude! And whatever frequency you post will be “just right!”
Hi Penelope – I’m new to your website, just discovered it less that a week ago, I think! And I have to say, I really admire you for honoring yourself. It shows integrity.
Will enjoy coming back to hear what you have to say. L.
Best of luck to you! Keeping promises to ourselves is one of the most important ways we can practice self love. It’s your blog…your world…and only you define it. Enjoy the adventure!
Quality over quantity. I’m much more likely to unsubscribe to a blog that posts oodles of dribble than one that posts great stuff and is quiet in between.
Well, talking about a good content post – even the one you write to say you can’t post more is great content. I just started reading your blog, but I so, so identify with what you brought up, and so admire you for carefully working through your decision and then being brave enough to put it here. i recently just realized that i also have an inner 13 year old (I think she hangs out with yours, she’s always telling me i’m not attractive enough too.) And, reading your post, I think I just realized I wish people would like me more too, and that is why I say yes to commitments that stretch me or would feel obligated to post more if I had a blog. So, thank you for giving me an ‘ah-a’ moment wihtyour post – I admire you more for writing twice a week for the reasons you have then writing more because people told you to. I’m going to print this out and read it over whenever I feel pushed to do something I have a nagging feeling is not right for me…
Agree completely. This is an area that I’m learning to do in my everyday life – knowing when to say no. I recently finally said no to a big responsibility last week, and even though the lady who asked me looked really disappointed, I stuck to my “no” and right now, as I think about it, am so relieved that I did. I enjoy your posts and am happy that you found a posting schedule that works for you!
I am so terrible at posting on my second blog and feel really bad about it all the time but you are right, life is about priorities and you have to do what is right for you at this moment in time. I love your blog whether you post once a month or once a day!
I’m so happy you wrote this post. I too have tried maintain twice a week, often I’ll write 3x but not consistently. I feel the same way you do – if I write more, the content won’t be as good, and my readers deserve better than that. But I feel so guilty, often. At the end of the day, you’re right and I plan to stick to it as well. We can do this!! xoxox